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August 13th, 2010
03:02 pm - Do not go gently into that good night.
Hello world,
This is a drive-by (or perhaps browse-by?) posting, if you will. There was a time in my life where I poured the best and the worst of myself onto these white, empty fields of cyberspace, This was my tie to friends from high school, the place where I stayed sane through some of the worst years of my life, and shared parts of some of the best.
Now, looking back, this all feels horribly self indulgent. I've thought aout deleting this journal, but there's too much I want to keep. I still write about my life, but that's on blogspot now, which feels like a more "adult" medium.
So, if anyone is reading this, and wondering where my writing is these days, drop a comment. I'll fill you in.
Peace
Current Location: Norway
Current Mood:  contemplative
Current Music: Shout Out Louds - Fall Hard
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June 10th, 2010
10:12 pm - Writer's Block: Prone to puns
Quirky sarcasm is the new black.
Current Mood:  amused
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September 8th, 2009
11:25 pm - Windy days, or the "emotional" stuff missing from my blog
Well, it's been a busy month, hasn't it? I' sitting here in my dorm, listening to the wind blow. Autumn is truly upon us. The first presentation and first assignment of my graduate school career are in, I've got a class party to go to on Thursday, and am reaching a point where I have people to walk to class with, to ride the T-bane with, to chat with at break, to watch movies with. Now, if I skip a class party, people ask why.
Small things, I know, but these are the sorts of small signs I need to help myself adjust to life here. Part of the reason I haven't been updating this (apart from moving the public "oh look, random nuggets of information about Norway" chronicling of my life in Norway to blogspot) is because I've been struggling a lot with the decision. This is not like an exchange year, this move has a feeling of permanence to it which has triggered a avalanche of homesickness. I miss my family, I miss being comfortable (if not happy), I miss being desi in a way I can't be here, where all the religion, tradition. language and food permeated my life. I would seriously give up a year of my life for a Panera. When I moved to Sweden, everything was shiny and new, I lived with great people, and everything was an adventure. Bagging my own groceries, shopping in small trips because everything closed early, learning how to navigate public transport and living on wasa crackers....it was different.
Now? I'm older and wiser. And, there was no moment of shiny newness, and what moments there were are linked with some massive administrative headaches. I've visted Norway a lot. I know what grocery stores are here, what I can buy, when I can buy it. I know about alcohol monopolies and apotek. I have to take a train to school, and I know how the winter can be, and already know that it will be rough. I'm not an exchange student, and my classes really matter. I'm not cutting class to travel, or going to kitchen parties. My roomate is 20, and it's odd, watching her live a life of parties and instant friendships. Im uilding friendships slowluy, I can see them forming, but it's hard, starting all over again.
And the personal life side of things is taking adjusting to. Facing up to the fact that I hopped the atlantic partially because of another person - albiet not the only reason - is a challenge for someone who fears relying too much on any one person. I'm analytical enough to see the flip side of every decision I make, and I wish I couldn't. It has been - and will continue to be - a struggle to say goodbye to the lives that might have been, so I can fully appreciate the life that is. I panicked about it, and forced a "break" - which lasted all of a few days before I regained a sense of control over my world and realized that when I was free to walk away, I was perfectly happy with where I was. Yet, it's hard when I see friends starting new relationships and realize that this part of my life is gone, that I have placed myself in a box which naturally excludes some possibilities, that there are things I'll never do ot experience because of who we are. But we'll make it. One of the mied blessings of my new life here is that my favorite Norwegian lives across the country from me still. Because he isn't here, I keep trying - trying to make friends, to get involved, to push myself to do things I wouldn't do if he was here. It's a paradox - I'll move across the atlantic to try something new, but walking up to a goup of my classmates and inviting myself along when they go to lunch, now, that is SCARY.
So really, I've been here a month, and I'm still all mixed up. Perhaps I'll be less mixed up as time goes on. Will that leave the journal more neglected? Time will tell.
Peace!
Current Location: Norway
Current Mood:  pensive
Current Music: Hur jag fick dig att älska mig
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July 21st, 2009
12:10 am - Moving to Norway: 2 weeks away
Greetings, Earthlings!
So, much has happened since I last updated. The biggest change is that I have accepted a place as a graduate student at the University of Oslo, in Oslo, Norway. For some reason, a large number of people seem to think Oslo is in Sweden. It is not. So yeah. I have to send off my student housing form, and then just hope my residence permit gets here on time. Of course, this has had a domino effect on other things, the biggest of which is I quit my job. Hard to work in DC and go to school in Europe simultaneously.
I swing between being excited and completely terrified. I have no idea what to expect. .I'm sure I'll be the only American in my program, and this is scarier than I anticipated. I'm actually more afraid of all the social aspects than I am of being a student. I know how to be a student. Starting all over with making friends is a lot harder.
Now, all I have to do is work, pack and skip the country. It's hard to believe that a month from now, I'll be a student again.
That's all for now.
Current Mood:  anxious
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May 16th, 2009
04:15 pm - More Eurovision
Germany: Apparently, Marilyn Manson's Ex is stripping in this song. Whoa, I LIKE this, so far. OIt's catchy and the singers can actually sing well. It''s a eurodance version of swing, which, along with prtugal has just made my "most likely to listen to when sober" list. Oooh, fire! And the singer is wearing sparly sequinned silver pants. And tere is a stripper on stage. Wait, the singer has his shirt open all the way, Is he stripping too? Wait, the stripper has a whip. Kinky.
Turkey: 12 points from Germany and the Netherlands, calling it now. Due to the economic crisis, Turkey;s costume budget was slashed, and the singers can only afford scraps of cloth. There's fire and off-key shouting. But the song is just bad. "You are the greatest dancer of all times" THe desecration of the english language continues.
Albania: THere is a man/woman in a sequinned green shirt which completely obscures his features. the singer is another generic sounding blonde. The green goblin disco man is much more entertaining.. Sequinned man has been joined by a guy spinning on his head. THis man is wearing all black, though. Wnd machine in force again. Whatever. Norway is next.
Norway: DFairytale: Norway hopes it will win with this. I like the song. pporly worded english? Check. fiddles? Check. Earnest young man of eastern European descent singing? check. Will be interesting to see if Norway gets votes from Belarus, which is where Alexander's family is from.
Ukraine: the singer comes out in the stripper version of a hamster wheel, which unfortunately isn't doing enough to redeeem how bad this song is for me. Apparently, the theme for interesting eurodance songs tis year is stripping, or something. Singer is blonde. She's taking us to her nest, where we can do the rest. Wait, does the nest have a hamster wheel? Because that could be pretty cool, and then the term cage would be more appropriate.The backup dancers look like "roman Chippendales" in the words of the Norwegian. I can't actually come up with a better description that that.
Romania: Another blonde, here to inform us that the balkan girls like to party like nobody." I wounder if there could be always something better" Romania, taking the english language boldly where it has thus far sensibly avoided going. THe backup dancers are all female and look like they are trying to molest the singer. romania, lesbian love anthem of Eastern Europe? Hmmmm.
UK: Norwegian has just told me this is written by Andrew Lloyd Webber. Oh so Andrew, how far you have fallen. I wonder which musical this was rejected from. the lyrics could fit Bobay Dreams or Phantom. OKay, I have decided, this was forcibly evicted from Bombay Dreams by A.R. rahman for beeing too cheesy, even for someone who writes Indian film songs. Wait, is that ALW behind the piano? The singer des not have a strong enough voice to hit all her glory notes.
Finland: Firespinners, burning oil drums, eurodance rap from Finland. Musically, this has nothing redeeming about it, but the firespinning is very cool. All blonde feale singing contingent again. Fireworks in addition to the rest of the pyro, good times.
Spain: La noche para mi...the night for me. Another singer whose wardrobe has been hit hard by the economic crisis. She can only afford hot pants and some sparkles to cover her boobs. Poor thing. See, Spain can't win, because they obviously can't afford to host the contest if they can't even buy thier singer clothes. She's also blond. Where have all the bruettes gone, Europe?
Russia: "We have heard all the finalists and now it is time to vote" Finally. I don't think could have taken any more. the russians tease us with something about a skit where the hosts dress as bears, but then reveal that this is aparently an attempt at humor. Oy. The russians bring out a feed to the Space Station so cosmonauts can start the voting. Um. Eurovision IN SPACE!!!
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03:36 pm - More Eurovision!
Iceland: Is it true? Oh god. Iceland is following the unwritten northern European rule about how all female singers much be blonde. I was so bored I started to mime actions to this song, which the Norwegian claims is more memorable than the song. THis just sounds like the background to a photo montage in a Lifetime/Hallmark movie. THe kind where the girl drives away the guy after misunderstanding his motives, where it will all be salvaged by the end film.
Greece: Synchronized dancing and the dude whobhosted a few years ago. THe dancing is making this song much better than it would be otherwise. Norwegian equates this with a greek Ricky Martin. Sakis' shirt s open, he's wearing all white, and is striking a pose where he looks like he's about to bowl. Key change and fire right on cue, about 2 minutes in. this is the kind of song that you would KNoW competed in Eurovision, ven if you hadn't watched it.
Armenia: Wait, are those Gagra Cholis repping on the Moscow stage? I am so confused. It's like a hindi movie got completely lost. And decided to sing in Armenian. No wait, skirts are cut in a way a Gagra would never be. Wait, green lasers? Okay,, this has just become the most entertaining thing so far. Between the strange outfits and lasers, this song is just...odd.
Russia: Wait for it...ANOTHER POWER BALLAD! In Russian, this time. At least the singer isn't. Oh wait, not a power ballad, just a slightly off tune bossa-nova inspired insult to music. I don't even know what to write anymore. THe singer has a closeup of her face projected over the stage, bhind her, which is really not helping this song at ALL. Now, if they wanted to impress me, they'd need to bust out CNN's hologram projections. THen I'd at least be interested. Singer is going for the win in overall wretched song-ness with some sort of odd scream. Oy.
Azerbaijan: They've imported Arash from Sweden to create an eastern theme dance song. This song has backyup dancers in strange short skirts and fire, making it more interesting than 80% of what we have seen already. Granted, this does not take much. At all. This is so disappointing.
Bosnia: Another ballad. Because we really haven't had enough of these yet. He has a good voice, and drummers. And well, I'e summed up this song for you. Due to diaspora voting, this will do well. Sigh.
Break, where the russians sing some random song in a badly choreographed "man on the street" song.
Moldova: Um, her dress. Purple, green, short., and looks a bit like a lampshade. Paired with bright purple boots. And her dancers ahve suspenders. And the dance/folk song turned into some sort of strange shouting . So far, this is by far the most entertaining thing I hae seen. Slightly off key, shouting, crazy outfis, and it isn't in English, so I can't judge the lyrics. Good work Moldova.
Malta: A somewhat substancial lady who references wise men less than 30 seconds in to the song. Yes folks, we have yet another power ballad! I suppose that, on the plus side, all European hallmark commercials have a vast song selection for the next year.
Norwegian is unsure if Hallmark exists here. Man, I need to move to this continent. My life would be so much better without Hallmark commericals. Not to mntion all the ones for male enhancements. Imagine not having to see Viagra or Cialis commercials. I need to remind myself of this more often.
Estonia: A country hich missed the "female singers must be blonde" memo. Wind machine out in force. Yet another decent song that is just extremely boring. Norwegian thinks we are not drunk enough. right. downing the glass of wine now. Let's see if this improves
Denmark: Boyband reject. Another decent singer with a boring song. Wait, " iwant to go back to the days when I had my friend?" Um, I'm guessing this was prior to his singing career, where people were willing to be associated with this man? He wants to believe again. So do I, Denmark, so do I. He never had a picture of a name? Who has pictures of names? MAKE IT STOP!!!! He's not even good looking enough to distract me from the song. Bah.
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03:33 pm - Eurovision!
Hello World! I am writing to you live from Southwestern Norway, where the annual syntastic shaltzfest that is the Eurovision song contest is coming to us live from Russia. So far, the Norwegian commentator has been mysteriously silent as the Russians put on the finest intro show Eastern Europe has to offer. So far, Unicycles, flamethrowers and spinning flaming batons somewhat androgenoys dancers, lite opera, and a freakish clown child have made an appearance. 9:07: Oh shit, Dima Bilan. Damnit. His creepy eyebrow waggling has been somewhat obscured by overgrown hair this time around, which does help. As I realized last year, this contest is so much more entertaining when not sober. Working on that now. 9:10: Okay, the russian commentators have come out with the first sentence that is theoretically in english, which I did not understand a single word of. In the meantime, the Norwegian commentator has made the first Hitler eference of the evening, by stating that if Alexander Rybak wins, he will ahve "conquered Moscow" something Hitler and Napolean failed to do. Oh, and the Norwegan is telling me that she said if Alexander wins, he will be "alexander the Great with a Fiddle" THank you Norway, for making te most ridiculously grandiose statements of the evening 15 minutes in. Lithuania: I wish I could work up the energy to say anything about tis. It's like the Backstret Boys. But in Russian. Oh god. 2) Israel: "There must be another way" Um, for what? An inspirational power ballad? I hope so, because while I understand that a Palestinian and israeli singing is all cute and symbolic, and this is quite well sung, it's just boring.this would be so much more interestng if there were backup dancers/stripper poles. Or both. Hmmmm France:: Fashion critique: Her classy balck dress looks like it is a bit too big in the boob area. Can't they at least get a decent tailor (or some tisue paper, adds Norwegian. THough I think those silicone gel patches might work better). French singer looks like she is trying to eat the mic. I don't know what else to say. THis sounds quite good, except for the note she just missed. It sounds like the perfect background music for a french cafe. Hence, it fails on the Eurovision level, as far as I am concerned. Better luck next year! Sweden: La Voix: Nightwish meets eurodance, complete with neon green lighting.Malena is an opera singer. Her backup dancers and walking in circles around her. Either way, it's the first song this evening which is memorable in any way. Holy shit, the backup dancers have flame shaped opera masks. Okay, full points for random accessories, Sweden. Croatia: Dear god, another ballad? Do any of these people plan on being uptempo ever? My goal of documenting or reactions to this spectacle is being challenged by a night of pasable ballads, minus anything remotely showy (sans the Swedes, who at least made an effort t
Portugal: Look, colorful stage, acoustic guitar, and a decent singer singing in Portugese, which makes this the song I am most likely to actually listen to outside of the contest. Once again, apart from the colors, it is a bit dull, but probably the best song so far.
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May 4th, 2009
11:49 pm - Too young for coffee?
It's been raining for 3 days straight here. After a journey through the gray outdoors to the gray cubicle jungle, I decided to go in search of a bagel and some motivation. As motivation cannot be purchased (at least not in my building), I ended up with a bagel and some overpriced coffee instead. This coffee led directly to the ollowing conversation:
Old Dude on Elevator: you're too young to be drinking coffee
Me: No, i need some kind of caffeine, otherwise I'll fall asleep
Old Dude on Elevator: No you're too young. You're only a baby. How old are you? 17? 18?
Me: 25, actually.
Old Dude on Elevator: No, you're a baby! But you're beautiful
Me:Thank you.
What can I say? Something about elevators brings out the truly random.
Current Mood: amused
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May 3rd, 2009
02:20 pm - Today's Most Hated, Overused Platitude: "We wish you had been here!"
Note: Today's passive-aggressive livejournal rant is sponsored by the never ending rain. the spectacular ineptitude that is Virginia Dominion Power's repair crew, and a desire to not alienate the older Desi community by saying this to thier face. At least not today.
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"We wish you had been there!" Variations on a simple phrase, a sweet sentiment with exclamation point optional. Normally, I don't harbor much ill-will toward it, despite it's overuse.
However, I do object to the use when the following constraints apply:
1) The event where you wish me to be is in my hometown
2) You invite me specifically, which a complete understanding of my lack of driving ability and the limitations of public transportation
3) You ask me to save the date in advance
4) The only reason I cannot attend is because I do not have a ride, not because of another commitment or responsibility
Now, I understand you are busy. I understand no one is irreplaceable, and that it is a drive out of your way to fetch me. I'm glad your event went down well. However, do not call me the next day and express the sentiment that "You wish I had been there" or "X & Y were saying ow much they wished they could have heard your perspective" when the only reason I am not there is because you could not find the time to give me a ride.
Let me simplify this further, using a simple formula: My presence < Your inconvenience. You can spin it however you want, but that is the crux of the matter. Hence, do not call me the net day to bleat platitudes at me, because you know what? I don't give a damn.
Current Mood:  annoyed
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April 18th, 2009
01:10 am
Today, the sky was a brilliant, clear blue, with nary a cloud to obstruct the sun. Weatherwise, the only complaint i could offer was wardrobe related - it's hard to dress for a day which starts at 40 degrees, and ends near 70, THis problem is only compounded further by the Casual Friday wardrobe challenges. Jeans? Acceptable. T shirts? Not acceptable. Hoodie sweaters? Yes. Hoodie sweatshirts? No. Oy Vey.
Since I can't complain about the weather, I instead will turn my excess irritation towards Twilight. After ignoring the hype for several years, I've finally decided to see what all the fuss is about. I'm about 8 chapters in, and so far, I don't get it. Bella Swan is a female, modernized Holden Caufield who irritates the daylights out of me. THe book feels like the author took all her fantasies about men, relationships, and high school and combined it into what I can currently describe as a lukewarm mess, devoid of any sense of reality. I can't believe this was compared to Harry Potter. One of the reasons I love Harry Potter is that the characters are fully defied, with physical and emotional flaws and strengths.. Bella Swan's only flaw so far seems to be excessive emo tendencies (of course, hidden from her classmates) and clumsiness. She's new, but everyone's falling over to date her, to be her friend, no one's mocking the missteps. Perhaps this improves. Anyone else read this already?
Night!
Current Mood: annoyed
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